Is "zinger" German for "bastard"?

"Thank you...thank you...you're too kind. So, a Catholic priest, a child molester and a rapist walk into a bar...and that's just the first guy!"

[A note to my Catholic friends: You are likely to find this rant patently offensive; please understand that my problem is with the Holy See, not you.]

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Joseph Ratzinger, aka Pope Benedict XVI, shows us once again that you can take the Kraut out of the Fatherland, but you can't take the Fatherland out of the Kraut. On 01/08/09, the Vatican issued a statement comparing Gaza to a "big concentration camp".

Yup, Your Assholiness...Gaza's just like a concentration camp. Except for the slave labor, medical experiments, Zyklon B and crematoria...but why quibble about minutiae, eh?

The Pope today condemned the use of violence by both Israel and Hamas in his annual speech to diplomats accredited to the Holy See. "Once again I would repeat that military options are no solution and that violence, wherever it comes from and whatever form it takes, must be firmly condemned," he said in an even-handed address.

He rejected "hatred, acts of provocation and the use of arms" and deplored the renewed outbreak of violence in Gaza which was "provoking immense damage and suffering for the civilian population".

He then muttered, "What the hell is wrong with you filthy Judenschwein that you won't just roll-over and die, along with the Gypsies, retards and homos? Hey wait a minute...is this thing still on? Scheiβ, scheiβ, SCHEIβ!!"

Echoing Pope Benedict's calls for an end to the bloodshed in the Gaza Strip, Cardinal Renato Martino, head of the Vatican Council for Justice and Peace, urged Israeli and Hamas to be "more willing" to hold peace talks. He accused both sides of only thinking of their own interests while civilians paid the price.

Cardinal Martino expressed concern over the humanitarian situation, saying "Let's look at the conditions in Gaza: these increasingly resemble a big concentration camp."

Except for the slave labor, medical experiments, Zyklon B and crematoria...

He added: "Defenceless populations are always the ones who pay."

Like the European Jews in the '30s and '40s, about whom Pope Pius XII (who deserves beatification about as much as Joe Stalin) did very little.

Or those Jews that your delightful cult came after during the Inquisition, like my forebear Jacob Lopez D'Olivera.

Not to mention the Jews today trying to live some sort of life in southern Israel, in-between rocket and mortar attacks from Gaza - frequently during a cease-fire which only one side honored.

It's painfully evident that the worms in a dog's stool have vastly greater moral authority than Catholic church officials; these are the same profoundly evil cocksuckers who for decades shuffled known child rapists from parish to parish. Non-consensual assfucking of altar boys is a stellar way of demonstrating God's love for the innocent. Especially when the only members of their flock whom the church actually protected were the disgusting "men of God" who committed those atrocious acts in the first place.

I would have thought that perhaps heinous behavior like that might make the baby Jesus cry; guess not.

Cardinal Martino made his comments to the Italian website IlSussidiario.net. He said that Christians "are not the only ones to call this land 'holy', Jews and Muslims do so too. The fact that this land is the scene of bloodshed seems a great tragedy. If they can't come to an agreement, then someone else should do it. The world cannot sit back and watch without doing anything."

Precious little of the bloodshed over thousands of years in the Holy Land was started by the Jews; rather, it was frequently their blood. Besides, you assholes fucking love bloodshed; it's part of your quaint little vampiric/cannibalistic rituals.

Jesus...nom, nom, nom.

So, Unholy See, if you can show me just one goddamned lampshade or bar of soap unquestionably made out of a Palestinian by the Israelis, I'll concede that comparing Gaza to a concentration camp might be valid.

Otherwise, kindly fold your pointy hats until they're even pointier and then sodomize yourselves with them. Which is probably a sin of some sort.

In which case, do us all a favor; don't confess it...kindly just drop dead and go to the Hell you so richly deserve.