Michigan spends taxpayers' money on Sno-Cone machines for "homeland security"

Original article here.

STANTON (MI) — The United States is fighting terrorism — one snow cone at a time.

Montcalm County recently received a $900 Arctic Blast Sno-Cone machine.

WTF?!?! Do they think that Saudi nationals or denizens of some other desert shithole will soil their M.C. Hammer pants when confronted with a paper cone filled with shaved ice?

"Oh camel crap, Abdullah...THEY'VE GOT ICE!!! Flee for your very life!!! AIIIEEEEE!"

The West Michigan Shoreline Regional Development Commission (WMSRDC) is a federal- and state-designated agency responsible for managing and administrating the homeland security program in Montcalm County and 12 other counties.

The WMSRDC recently purchased and transferred homeland security equipment to these counties — including 13 snow cone machines at a total cost of $11,700.

Every single bureaucrat who signed-off on this request ought to be buried under a mountain of snow large enough to either suffocate them or cause terminal hypothermia.

The machines were funded by a grant from the Michigan Homeland Security Program. The request for a snow cone machine came from another county, but all 13 counties received them.

No doubt, being good stewards of the monies forcibly extorted from taxpayers, they got a fabulous bulk-purchase discount...NOT! A quick perusal of EBay finds that these machines can be purchased singly for less than $550.00 each.

The purchase raised some questions at a recent Montcalm County Board of Commissioners meeting. Commissioners wondered about the machine and questioned its purpose.

The Michigan Homeland Security Grant Program’s Allowable Cost Justification document, dated May 9, 2011, says the snow cone machines can make ice to prevent heat-related illnesses during emergencies, treat injuries and provide snow cones as an outreach at promotional events.

The photo above - which accompanied the original article and was credited to its writer - clearly shows it's merely a machine to shave ice; there is no freezer unit integrated into it. The units for sale at EBay also do not make ice.

In other words, the Allowable Cost Justification document is patently dishonest.

Additionally, what the hell kind of "outreach" does "homeland security" require? They already do entirely too much "outreach" to old ladies and children at airports.

WMSRDC Executive Director Sandeep Dey said one county requested a popcorn machine, but that request was denied. He said the snow cone machine request would not have been granted by itself, but was approved because it came with other homeland security equipment.

Only one county requested a Sno-Cone machine, yet thirteen received them; why was the popcorn machine treated differently? And WTF does a popcorn machine have to do with homeland security?

“It is used to attract people so they can be educated and prepared for homeland security,” Dey said from his office in Muskegon. “More importantly, they (homeland security officials) felt in a medical emergency the machine was capable of making ice packs which could be used for medical purposes.”

Jesus Fucking Christ and His Orchestra...in what way will they educate and prepare people for homeland security?

"Sorry we fondled your little girl; how's about we give her a Sno-Cone and maybe she'll stop crying?"

"Stop resisting or we'll shove shaved ice down your panties, grandma!"

The snow cone machine is currently being stored in the Montcalm County Emergency Services (MCES) building in Stanton. MCES Director David Feldpausch said the machine could be useful at the scene of a large fire or during very hot weather.

Except for the simple fact that the machine doesn't actually make fucking ice.

“I don’t like the term snow cone machine, because it sounds horrible,” Feldpausch said. “When you look at it as an ice shaving machine and its purpose, it makes a little more sense. I assume it will get used in Montcalm County a lot more in the summertime by the Fire Corps.”

It's fucking purpose is to take ice made in another machine and shave it to make goddamned Sno-Cones, you ignorant fucktard.

Since when does a Fire Corps need to add Sno-Cones to its list of firefighting equipment? I suppose next, they'll want to purchase a vending truck and ice maker so they can make them at disaster scenes.

(And you can bet your ass they'll overpay for that equipment, too.)

Occupy Wall Street Protesters Preoccupied with Money...Just Like the Wall Streeters They're Protesting!

Original NY Post article here: They want $lice of the occu-pie.

Even in Zuccotti Park, greed is good.

Yep...for a mean-spirited laugh.

Occupy Wall Street’s Finance Committee has nearly $500,000 in the bank, and donations continue to pour in -- but its reluctance to share the wealth with other protesters is fraying tempers.

Color me surprised the "Finance Committee" doesn't want to share. And why the fuck do a bunch of quasi-anarchists have any sort of "committee"?

Some drummers -- incensed they got no money to replace or safeguard their drums after a midnight vandal destroyed their instruments Wednesday -- are threatening to splinter off.

I suspect the "midnight vandal" was an aggrieved neighbor (who likely pays a lot of rent for a dinky closet with a toilet and shower) deciding they'd had just about enough artless ersatz "tribal drumming" in the wee hours. (At a certain point, even Art Fucking Blakey would get tiresome...and I say that as a jazzer. I doubt I could stomach more than three minutes of gormless hippies exercising their non- existent "right" to bang shit like a hyperactive three-year-old on meth.

I cannot endeavor to put my finger on any part of our Constitution which enshrines a right to percussive pandemonium by unwashed urchins...or anyone else.

“F--k Finance. I hope Mayor Bloomberg gets an injunction and demands to see the movement’s books. We need to know how much money we really have and where it’s going,” said a frustrated Bryan Smith, 45, who joined OWS in Lower Manhattan nearly three weeks ago from Los Angeles, where he works in TV production.

Well, Mr. Legal Eagle....precisely what standing does Bloomberg have to request an injunction? And do you really want to get him involved? After all, he'd probably be more concerned about monitoring the sodium intake and tobacco consumption of your comrades. (BTW - I strongly suspect that "works in TV production" means either "middle-aged production assistant" or "extra".)

Smith is a member of the Comfort Working Group -- one of about 30 small collectives that have sprung up within OWS. The Comfort group is charged with finding out what basic necessities campers need, like thermal underwear, and then raising money by soliciting donations on the street.

Huh...I thought panhandling was illegal in NYC. Not to mention that having so many "collectives" is certainly not real "collectivism" (which is defined as "the political principle of centralized social and economic control, especially of all means of production").

“The other day, I took in $2,000. I kept $650 for my group, and gave the rest to Finance. Then I went to them with a request -- so many people need things, and they should not be going without basic comfort items -- and I was told to fill out paperwork. Paperwork! Are they the government now?” Smith fumed, even as he cajoled the passing crowd for more cash.

The Finance Committee dives on whatever dollars are raised by all the OWS working groups, said Smith, and doesn’t give it back.

I'm guessing the Finance Committee has the "ability" to give you free shit, they just don't see the "need". (For more info, see: Marx, Karl.)

Your complaints regarding the Finance Committee "diving" on the money working groups bring in and not wanting to give it back sounds rather similar to something one of those horrid, racist, ignorant and despicable Tea Partiers might say. In fact, you sound like one of those greedy, selfish bastards who object to money they brought home being confiscated from them to be spent in ways they have no control over.

Why do you hate redistribution and economic justice, Mr. Smith?

The Comfort group has an allowance of $150 a day, while larger working groups, like the Kitchen group, get up to $2,000.

That's probably because "food riots" are more of a potential danger than "laundry riots". Especially with lefty protesters.

“What can I do with $150?” said Smith. “We have three tons of wet laundry here from the rainstorm -- how do I get that done? We need winter gear, shoes, socks. I could spend $10,000 alone for backpacks people need. We raise all this money. Where is it?”

Y'all should have thought of the laundry issue sooner, Mr. Smith...if that is your real name. And what the fuck sort of fancy urban hippie backpacks cost ten thousand fucking dollars, anyway?

Pete Dutro, 36, a Brooklyn tattoo artist who is getting a master’s in finance and sits on the Finance Committee, said big purchases like Smith’s can’t get immediate approval.

“We don’t have the power for that. They have to go to the General Assembly. If it’s approved, we pay out that amount and make sure everything is accounted for,” he said.

Maaaan...for a bunch of jackasses "occupying" a mere three-quarters of an acre of concrete (plus a few scrawny trees), you sure do have a lot of bureaucracy. Fight the power, dude!

Within the next few days, the Financial Committee will release a detailed report, he said.

If I were you, I'd audit it very carefully, Mr. "Getting a Master's in Finance"; half a million bucks is a lot of temptation to a bunch of people with no jobs. BTW...are they using "cash" or "accrual"? Buwahahahahaha!

Yesterday, a huge flat-screen TV went up in Zuccotti Park for a movie night and pajama party with popcorn. Organizers hoped it would attract new recruits -- even as some long-timers complained that the movement was getting too diffuse after yesterday’s lackluster showing at a police-brutality event in Union Square that barely attracted 50 participants.

Lackluster showing at a police brutality event? Not enough pepper spraying and/or heads caved-in? Lazy union pigs. Oh, wait...

“I think it’s getting too spread out,” said John Glowa, 57. “My sense from where I live is that it’s losing steam. We gotta plug the holes.”

Better ask the General Assembly for a shit ton of caulking; I'd recommend GeoCel tri-polymer sealant. (Don't thank me...I'm a giver.)

Some activists, like those in Pulse, the committee that represents Zuccotti Park drummers, are a bit worn out by all the collective activity.

Last week, on a rainy night, someone stabbed holes in many of the protesters’ drums with a knife, said Elijah Moses, 19, of Queens, a founder of the Pulse Working Group. Moses asked the General Assembly -- the nightly meeting where protesters collectively vote on OWS decisions -- for $8,000 to replace the drums, and build a small shed to lock them up.

Eight thousand dollars for fucking drums and a storage shed??!? If you didn't all at least pretend to hate corporations, you could just go to Home Depot and get a shed and a bunch of ten-dollar five-gallon buckets for, oh, say, three hundred samoleans. (Of course, the shed and drums would be made of teh evil plastic...but you'd save $7,700.00 of "the people's money".)

“They said no -- they turned us down. I’m really frustrated,” said Moses.

I think it would be most amusing to pit your frustration against the "collective" (see what I did there?) frustration of the folks who live and/or work in the neighborhood of Zuccotti Park who are almost certainly weary of you lot worsening their quality of life with your pretentious, pathetic attempt to "make a difference"

The sixties are calling; they want their memes back. (But they'll probably let you keep the toe-sucking, knife-wielding nutjobs.)

OWSers Tire Of Free Pizza; Begin To Eat Their Own

(Original New York Magazine article here.)

All occupiers are equal — but some occupiers are more equal than others. In wind-whipped Zuccotti Park, new divisions and hierarchies are threatening to upend Occupy Wall Street and its leaderless collective.

Collectivism - how does it work? Oh yeah...not too well.

As the protest has grown, some of the occupiers have spontaneously taken charge on projects large and small. But many of the people in Zuccotti Park aren't taking direction well, leading to a tense Thursday of political disagreements, the occasional shouting match, and at least one fistfight.

Sounds like there have been numerous "teachable moments"; alas, I surmise very little learning is occurring

It began, as it so often does, with a drum circle. The ten-hour groove marathons weren’t sitting well with the neighborhood’s community board, the ironically situated High School of Economics and Finance that sits on the corner of Zuccotti Park, or many of the sleep-deprived protesters.

TEN HOURS A DAY?!?!?

Drum circles are the last bastion for those who couldn't master even three lousy guitar chords. (Those being, in "The People's Key", E, A and B.) They're also a graphic demonstration that complex polyrhythms ain't quite the same as "playing whatever the fuck you feel like".

Not to mention that, since they're almost universally populated with white people, the rhythmic emphasis tends to be on 1 and 3...'cause a lot o' honkies don't got no riddem.

While these shenanigans may have continued for ten hours at a stretch, one can safely presume said "marathon" was seriously lacking in "groove". Guys like Art Blakey, Tony Williams, David Garibaldi, Clyde Stubblefield, Mike Clark and Jabo Stark "groove"; caucasian trust-funders with degrees in worthless ______-studies degrees, not so much.

“[The high school] couldn’t teach,” explained Josh Nelson, a 27-year-old occupier from Nebraska. “And we’ve had issues with the drummers too. They drum incessantly all day, and really loud.” Facilitators spearheaded a General Assembly proposal to limit the drumming to two hours a day. “The drumming is a major issue which has the potential to get us kicked out," said Lauren Digion, a leader on the sanitation working group.

Probably due not only to the volume, but the incredible suck as well. Criminy...even a journeyman Ghanian drummer learns that it's far more musical to give it a rest every once in a while.

Also..."sanitation working group"? Puhleeze...I'll bet they haven't even gotten past the "piss here, shit there" stage.

But the drums were fun. They brought in publicity and money. Many non-facilitators were infuriated by the decision and claimed that it had been forced through the General Assembly.

"THIS IS WHAT COLLECTIVISM LOOKS LIKE!" (And should furnish a practical lesson in why the US is a representative republic rather than a democracy...but probably won't.)

“They’re imposing a structure on the natural flow of music," said Seth Harper, an 18-year-old from Georgia. “The GA decided to do it ... they suppressed people’s opinions. I wanted to do introduce a different proposal, but a big black organizer chick with an Afro said I couldn’t.”

Help! The "natural flow of music" is bein' repressed! See the violence inherent in the lack of system!

To Shane Engelerdt, a 19-year-old from Jersey City and self-described former “head drummer,” this amounted to a Jacobinic betrayal. “They are becoming the government we’re trying to protest," he said. "They didn’t even give the drummers a say ... Drumming is the heartbeat of this movement. Look around: This is dead, you need a pulse to keep something alive.”

How can a "collective" have a "head drummer"? Also...what a pretentious, clueless little asshole.

The drummers claim that the finance working group even levied a percussion tax of sorts, taking up to half of the $150-300 a day that the drum circle was receiving in tips. “Now they have over $500,000 from all sorts of places,” said Engelerdt. “We’re like, what’s going on here? They’re like the banks we’re protesting."

The drummers clearly weren't paying their "fair share". Further, they ought to pay license and permit fees for their 5-gallon plastic tubs, tambourines and whatever other "instruments" they're using. After all, we can't have "percussion instruments" in just anyone's hands, right.

I'd also suggest a 5-day waiting period and background check before someone is supplied with noisy shit. Not to mention strict testing to ensure a sense of rhythm and micro-stamping of drum sticks...because we have waaaaay to many percussion instruments in private hands in this country.

All belongings and money in the park are supposed to be held in common, but property rights reared their capitalistic head when facilitators went to clean up the park, which was looking more like a shantytown than usual after several days of wind and rain. The local community board was due to send in an inspector, so the facilitators and cleaners started moving tarps, bags, and personal belongings into a big pile in order to clean the park.

Wow, what a bunch of quislings; caving-in to "the man" like that. SHAME! SHAME! SHAME! SHAM!

But some refused to budge. A bearded man began to gather up a tarp and an occupier emerged from beneath, screaming: “You’re going to break my fucking tent, get that shit off!” Near the front of the park, two men in hoodies staged a meta-sit-in, fearful that their belongings would be lost or appropriated.

Heh. I thought their stuff ought to be part of the "collective"; isn't that how collectivism works? And what the fuck is a "meta-sit-in"?

meta adj - self-referential; referring to itself or its characteristics, esp. as a parody; about. Example: That book is so meta.

Maaaan...while I was once that young, I'm pretty sure I was never that fucking stupid.

Daniel Zetah, a 35-year-old lead facilitator from Minnesota, mounted a bench. “We need to clear this out. There are a bunch of kids coming to stay here.” One of the hoodied men fought back: “I’m not giving up my space for fucking kids. They have parents and homes. My parents are dead. This is my space.”

Hoodied man, meet eminent domain.

I hope that Suzanne Kelo is pointing in your general direction and having a good laugh at your expense.

Other organizers were more blunt. “If you don’t want to be part of this group, then you can just leave,” yelled a facilitator in a button-down shirt, “Every week we clean our house.” Seth Harper, the pro-drummer proletarian, chimed in on the side of the sitters. “We disagree on how we should clean it. A lot of us disagree with the pile.” Zetah, tall and imposing with a fiery red beard, closed debate with a sigh. “We’re all big boys and girls. Let’s do this.” As he told me afterwards, “A lot of people are like spoiled children." The cure? A cold snap. “Personally, I cannot wait for winter. It will clear out these people who aren’t here for the right reasons. Bring on the snow. The real revolutionaries will stay in -50 degrees.”

Paging Mr Gore...Mr. Albert Gore...

“The sunshine protestors will leave,” said “Zonkers,” a 20-year-old cleaner and longtime occupier from Tennessee. (He asked that his name not be used due to a felony marijuana conviction.) “The people who remain are the people who care. You get a lot of crust punks, silly kids, people who want to panhandle ... It disgusts me. These people are here for a block party.”

"Yeah...they should be here for the pawthetic freak show, instead."

Another argument broke out next to the pile of appropriated belongings, growing taller by the minute. A man named Sage Roberts desperately rifled through the pile, looking for a sleeping bag. “They’ve taken my stuff,” he muttered. Lauren Digion, the sanitation group leader, broke in: “This isn’t your stuff. You got all this stuff from comfort [the working group]. It belongs to comfort.”

THIS IS WHAT (PURE) DEMOCRACY LOOKS LIKE, BITCHEZ!

And as I spoke to Michael Glaser, a 26-year-old Chicagoan helping lead winter preparation efforts, a physical fight broke out between a cleaner and a camper just feet from us.

“When cleanups happen, people get mad,” Glaser said. “This is its own city. Within every city there are people who freeload, who make people’s lives miserable. We just deal with it. We can’t kick them out.”

*DING DING DING DING DING* This is why freeloaders suck, Mr. Glaser. And why some of your fellow citizens take a rather dim view of them.

In response to dissatisfaction with the consensus General Assembly, many facilitators have adopted a new “spokescouncil” model, which allows each working group to act independently without securing the will of the collective. “This streamlines it,” argued Zonkers. “The GA is unwieldy, cumbersome, and redundant."

Are you beginning to understand why less government and more individual freedom might be a very good thing, Mr. Zonkers?

From today’s battles, it’s not yet clear who will win the day: the organizers or the organized. But the month-long protest has clearly grown and evolved to a point where a truly leaderless movement will risk eviction — or, worse, insurrection.

Since these dipshits are "occupying" private property, they should have been evicted weeks ago. But I'd settle for insurrection, providing there's copious video.

As the communal sleeping bag argument between Lauren Digion and Sage Roberts threatened to get out of hand, a facilitator in a red hat walked by, brow furrowed. “Remember? You’re not allowed to do any more interviews,” he said to Digion. She nodded and went back to work. But when Roberts shouted, “Don’t tell me what to do!” Digion couldn't hold back.

There's trouble in collectivist paradise? Imagine that.

“Someone has to be told what to do," she said. "Someone needs to give orders. There’s no sense of order in this fucking place.”

BUWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! So many teachable moments...so little learning.

An open letter to Allied Waste Services in Gwinnett County

Dear Tertiary Syphilis Victims:

Despite the fact I put my bin curbside in precisely the same place I put it every week, your highly trained cadre of mobile sanitation engineers refuse monkeys neglected to pick it up.

When I phoned your offices, I was placed on hold for approximately ten minutes, during which time I was regaled non-stop with all of the services your company provides, how large you are, how long you've been in business and myriad other self-serving bunkum attempting to demonstrate that you're the best refuse service ever.

May I disrespectfully suggest this is not your smartest public relations move, given that your garbage gibbons somehow missed the large blue bin emblazoned with your logo placed in a location where it has been placed on each and every pick-up day since Gwinnett County shoved you down our throat.

When you fail so abysmally at such a goddamned simple task, do you really think it's good marketing to up-sell an already-irked customer?

"Hmmmm...their trash barrel baboons have once again failed to empty my bin which in-turn forced me to wait on hold while listening to their hype; I THINK I'LL ORDER A FUCKING ROLL-OFF BIN FROM THEM, TOO!"

Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.

At least the very pleasant and professional individual who finally got my call made the correct noises, apologized and promised the situation would be rectified. (Of course, actions speak louder than words...)

UPDATE: To my pleasant surprise, the trash was collected the very next day and the bin placed neatly back on my treelawn.

Of Marriage Licenses and Statism

BrendaK and I went to Marietta, GA today and got our marriage license...yay!

However, the entire process has been instructive of statist assholery here in (allegedly) "conservative" Georgia. Around here, "conservative" seems to mean "31 varieties of Baptists", rather than, y'know, small government.

Otherwise, we could have just gone about 1.5 miles up the road to the Larryville civic center. 'Cept here in Gwinnett County, one must produce a birth certificate in order to procure a marriage license. Showing a valid GA Driver's License, which also requires a birth certificate to procure, jest ain't good enough.

Neighboring Cobb County requires only a valid GA DL, so off we went to Marietta, their county seat. Where there's quite a gummint construction boom going on, which is clearly being financed by outrageous fees extorted from the taxpayers lumpenproletariat.

First off, the flat parking fee of $5.00 is basically subsidizing parking for lawyers. In all of the other cities I've lived, the only time you see flat-rate parking anywhere is either "early-in" for folks working in the vicinity, "after 5:00 p.m." in areas where there some sort of night life or other attractions and "special event" parking.

A flat $5.00 fee in the middle of the day at a busy court or government complex isn't anything more than parking welfare for fucking attorneys. Even in Los Angeles, where I pulled many a building permit over the years, they didn't have the audacity to charge such a high flat rate.

Our destination was "Building D2", since the statist fuckers who run Cobb County apparently haven't the imagination to name any of their copious new buildings the "Clem Milsaps Taxpayer Fleecing Facility" or the "Cletus and Lucinda Fayette Memorial Mouth-Breathers Employment Tower". "Building D2" sounds like something from the script of a particularly lame dystopian film written by an independent video store clerk who's convinced he's the next Quentin Tarantino.

Immediately upon entering the building, there was a security checkpoint. (Whoever thought that putting the probate clerk's office in the same new facility as actual courtrooms was a good idea needs to be used as a special treat for killer whales; just sayin'.) We had to empty our pockets, remove our belts and deposit all our personal posessions in a plastic tub for electronic scrutiny before passing through a metal detector overseen by a deputy who was trying to look gimlet eyed, but merely succeeded in resembling a rejected extra from "Deliverance".

After being cleared through Deppity Jimmy Joe's "magic picture thingummy", we proceeded to the probate clerk's office. Amazingly, that office - while being in a building which I would estimate to be less than five years old - looked like one which had been extant since 1923 and never maintained save for the occasional coat of poorly-applied paint. Seriously. It appeared old and dilapidated, replete with one of those 8' folding tables generally seen at church socials heavily laden with a variety of Jell-o concoctions containing Mandarin oranges, celery, carrot shavings, fruit cocktail and/or Miracle Whip.

We approached the window, at which point we learned that we could only pay the outrageous $56.00 fee in cash. (Crikey...even in relatively sleepy, suburban Gwinnett County, I have yet to pay any sort of baksheesh to the local gummint which cannot be done using an ATM card.)

Upon being informed of a Bank of America branch a couple of blocks away, I volunteered to make the trek while Brenda filled-out the “Application for Permission from Ol’ Massa to Get Married”. As I returned to Building D2, I once again emptied my pockets, removed my belt and waited for Ossifer Squinty to wave me through his "Testicle Irradiating Device Mark IV", after which I proceeded to the probate clerk's office.

I signed the paperwork and we forked over our cold cash and Driver's Licenses to an older woman who was actually quite pleasant and efficient. (Although she did ask us if we were cousins, but we think it was 'cause we were joking about that while affixing our scrawls to the government "permission slip".)

And voila...about three minutes later, we had our Official Gummint Permission to Marry. Which is a Very Good Thing, indeed.

But yet, I cannot see where the government has any vested interest - save extorting $56.00 plus parking for all of three minutes' work - in demanding that we must ask for official permission to wed. As an added indignity (and revenue source for Cobb County), in order to get "certified" copies of our Marriage Certificate (after it has been signed by our paid State Certified and Licensed Wedding Officiant, duly filed and processed), we have to pony-up an additional $10 a pop.

Fuck me...in previous times, we could have just jumped over a sword together and been done with it. Plus had a keen souvenir weapon as a keepsake...and as a weapon. (But we'll be getting a Mossberg 500 with a pistol grip soon.)

While I am overjoyed to be marrying Brenda, I still think it is utter bullshit - as well as contrary to individual liberty - to have to apply for permission from the state and pay fees before the state will oh-so-graciously allow us to get married.

Fortunately, she's worth it.

Up yours, Reverend

As part of his continuing struggle for relevance pathetically-needed attention, Jesse Jackson has weighed-in on the LeBron James story:

He [Cavaliers' owner Dan Gilbert] speaks as an owner of LeBron and not the owner of the Cleveland Cavaliers. His feelings of betrayal personify a slave master mentality. He sees LeBron as a runaway slave.

Really, Jesse? Did Gilbert send a baying pack of hounds and an armed posse after James? How many "slaves" were paid millions of dollars by their "masters"? How many "slaves" had contracts with free agency clauses in them?

These accusations endanger LeBron. His jersey is being burned in effigy, and he is being projected as a betrayer by the owner.

And this "endangers" James how? (BTW, it's also LeBron's fans who are calling him a "bum", a "quitter" as well as less flattering names. Y'know...the same fans who bought tons of branded merchandise which made him a very wealthy man. And unlike you, Reverend, he didn't have to shake anyone down to become well-off.)

Here's the definition of "effigy", you profoundly ignorant assclown:

effigy–noun, plural -gies.
1. a representation or image, esp. sculptured, as on a monument.
2. a crude representation of someone disliked, used for purposes of ridicule.

Aggrieved Cavs fans, including black folks, were burning jerseys, bobbleheads and other LeBron James merchandise. Which they presumably paid for with their own hard-earned dollars, making said merchandise their property to dispose of as they see fit.

To my knowledge, no "effigies" of James were burned, save in the profound depths of your delusions. (Much like your utter delusion of Dr. Martin Luther King - who, unlike you, was a civil rights leader worthy of respect - dying in your arms, you prevaricating scumbag.)

LeBron is not a child, nor is he bound to play on Gilbert’s plantation and be demeaned.

Guess LeBron must have been a "house Negro", as he lived in some mighty fine digs on Gilbert's "plantation".

Mr. Gilbert's statement is mean, arrogant and presumptuous.

Pot. Kettle. Black.

Y'know, Jesse...for a guy whose entire career as a "civil rights leader" is based on a series of egregious lies (the fake bloody shirt, enforcing your early Chicago boycotts with the Blackstone Rangers - a violent criminal gang then-run by your half-brother - etc.), you've got a lot of fucking nerve.

It's rather unfortunate that James Earl Ray didn't murder you instead of Dr. King. America would probably have been better off.

So up yours, Jesse...no apology and no pie for you.

Gwinnett County Deputy Michael G. "Cletus" Cummings

When first we met Deputy Cummings, he had recently arrested County Commissioner Charles Bannister for DUI. Only problem was that two Intoxilizer tests and a blood test proved that Bannister's BAC was .000.

D'oh!

Now we find that Deputy Cummings has a track record of DUI stop-related irregularities:

The Gwinnett County Sheriff's deputy who mistakenly charged Commission Chairman Charles Bannister with drunken driving last week had misjudged DUI cases twice before.

A review of Deputy Michael G. Cummings' personnel file showed that he was disciplined for twice determining an impaired person to be sober while he worked for the Gwinnett County Police Department. Cummings resigned from the police department in 2006 to take a job at the Sheriff's Department.

On one occasion, he didn't catch that a driver who had caused a "minor accident" was intoxicated. On the other, he testified that a friend who tested at more than double the legal limit was not drunk.

At the time of both previous "errors", Deputy Cummings was employed by the Gwinnett County Police Department. So this bastard, who has (presumably) taken an oath to uphold the law at least twice, perjured himself and only got a three-day suspension? Hey, Sheriff Butch...why does this asshole still have a job with your agency? Since you and the Gwinnett Sheriff's Department demonstrably have no respect for the law, why the fuck should the citizenry?

Bannister's attorney, Alan Mullinax, said that the deputy's history is troubling.

"The whole believability and credibility of this officer is shot," Mullinax said.

No shit. And yet, he still has a job. Which involves carrying a fucking badge and gun. And the power to abrogate my civil rights.

As always, I'm sure that none of "Deputy Cletus'" fine brother officers ever noticed any problems with his ability to uphold the law. I'm confident that all three of these errors in judgment are the only instances of his malfeasance in his entire career. And look, he was caught at it! Hey...the system works!

Again, why the fuck does this incompetent moron still have a job in LE?

Bannister's attorney said he believes the arrest was politically motivated. He has asked the GBI to look into why the Sheriff's department deputies waited outside the bar for nearly an hour for Bannister to leave. Mullinax wants to know why the deputies never intervened to prevent Bannister from driving if they suspected he was drunk. He questions why deputies did not hand off the case to police, and why Bannister, 71, was asked to perform two field sobriety tests that are not recommended for someone over age 60.

Because cops all over this country are a criminal gang operating under the color of law and politicians won't do a goddamn thing to fix it. How about it, you "conservative", "law and order" politicians in Gwinnett...are you gonna get off of your fat, lazy and corrupt asses to actually do your goddamn jobs?

Of course not. Ergo, fuck each and every one of you. And your families, since you won't do anything about keeping my family safe from known bad cops.

Perhaps the next time one of you gets pulled over for no legitimate reason by some asshole with a badge, you'll wind up dead at the hands of the law you pretend to respect.

There'd be a little actual justice in that.

LeBron's not the "bad guy"

To the sportstards™ of NE Ohio:

The average Cleveland sports fan is a fucking moron.

Most of you haven't given an actual shit that your local "liberal", "progressive" leaders have been stealing your asses blind for decades. In large part by colluding with the union thugs (and their supporters) as well as the ethnic grievance mongers.

The high taxation and over-regulation so beloved by you brain-dead assholes have driven virtually every successful company from the area. But you haven't given a flying fuck about any of that crap.

Because the average Clevelander would appear to spend a significant fraction of their non-working time guzzling down brews, burgers and wings while obsessing about professional sports.

And now that the (apparently) one professional athlete on any of your fucking loser teams who is actually worth a shit decided to make a career choice based upon what's good for him instead of Cleveland, you villify him.

Fuck you, morons. Your cheering James on is not what made him a competent basketball player. His in-born talent and hard work did that. Your purchase of LeBron-branded shoes, jerseys, posters, keychains, etc., did not improve his ability to sink three-pointers. You weren't there in his backyard encouraging him to keep practicing when he was in junior high school. You didn't actually do shit for him except voluntarily fork-over your money like a chump for branded merchandise because you thought he was your sports savior.

He. Owes. You. Fuck. All.

If your pathetic life is so empty that you emotionally invest yourself in fucking basketball to the point where you brand him a "traitor", a "bum" and worse for accepting a better job, he's not to blame.

Rather, you are to blame. If the braindead lot of you had invested a tiny fraction of the energy you devote to sports into learning the countless ways your local leaders have been decimating your town for decades, perhaps Cleveland wouldn't be well down the road toward becoming the next Detroit.

So go ahead. Burn your jerseys, bobbleheads and other memorabilia. Act like immature fuckheads because someone chose career advancement over staying in a dying an effectively dead city.

Clearly, the collective lot of you never gave enough of a crap about Cleveland to elect more competent leaders who might make a positive difference in your day-to-day lives. And if you demonstrably don't give a rat's ass about Cleveland, why should LeBron James?

You are the "bums".

You are the "traitors".

Why not set yourselves on fire instead? And immolate your worthless civic leaders, too. That might actually make a teeny, tiny change for the better.

Assholes.